Childhood wasn't any crappier than most. Probably a lot better. No abuse - at least not the kind that leaves physical scars.
Had money. Family was upper-middle class affluent. Unreligious. Traditional family roles. Father was a businessman. Mother was a homemaker. Eleven year age difference.
Father grew up working class in the Depression. Mother was well-off.
Mother read self-help books, wrote in a journal, did her job but became increasingly dissatisfied and unhappy.
Mother had lots of hobbies; rode horses, took a correspondence course to become a veterinary medical technician, photography. Only amounted to temporary distractions.
Mother decided she wanted out of marriage when kids were in high-school. Told the kids that Father had stayed the same, but she'd changed.
Mother also said "I'm done being a martyr."
Was 'the baby' of the family and Mother was protective. After parents split stayed with Mother.
Father was the baby of his family too. Also had a protective mother. Lived at home until he was 30 years old.
Lived with Mother as she was dating. Kicked him out at 25.
Never had much in common with Father. Father didn't offer financial help or guidance.
Never asked Father for anything because strings were attached. Any hand-out was packaged in expectation and disappointment.
Father would say, "When I die all my money will be yours anyway," like it was a warning.
Told Father, "I don't want your money," which was only partially true.
Both parents eventually died after brief illnesses.
Says it was quick, "As if they'd decided they weren't worthy of being cared for by others."
Says he finally felt liberated.
Got some inheritance, like Father promised. Made life a bit easier.
Says he could finally appreciate parents for giving what they could without feeling guilty for receiving it.
Says not having expectations is why he doesn't feel lonely. Accepts people for who they are. Observes that if you expect the people around you to be who you want them to be, then you will be lonely, because only you matter.
Doesn't blame parents.
Wants to know why he’s never been in love.
